Shattered after the war
by HazelAuror70
Summary: Songfic to "Shattered" by Trading Yesterday. Harry Potter reflects on the events of the second battle at hogwarts during the morning after.


_Yesterday I died; tomorrow's bleeding  
>Fall into your sunlight<em>

Harry Potter stood silently, observing the rubble before him. From the window in the Hospital Wing, the entire battle's events unfolded before his eyes and the weight of what he, no they, had done crashed down upon him.

_The future's open wide beyond believing  
>To know why hope dies<br>And losing what was found, a world so hollow  
>Suspended in a compromise<br>_

But he was alive. After everything that had happened, this fact shocked him and sent him spiraling down to earth. He had never considered a future of what would happen after the war. His only objective and thought had been to eradicate the world of Voldemort forever.

But not everything had gone as planned. So many lives were lost; Fred Weasley, Remus Lupin, Tonks, so many others. He understood, that at times like these, sacrifices would have to be made, they would not die in vain, he vowed. It was a compromise, nevertheless.

_the silence of this sound is soon to follow  
>Somehow sundown<br>And finding answers  
>Is forgetting all of the questions we call home<br>Passing the graves of the unknown  
><em>

The halls, and all of Hogwarts, was filled with an eerie silence, mourning all the lives that were lost. They battle was over and the long ragged day had come to a fruition. Somehow, Harry knew he had it inside him all along, he would only have to look for it. He had always known what he would have to do to defeat Voldemort, it had just been about coming to terms with it, it had been about time.

_As reason clouds my eyes with splendor fading  
>Illusions of the sunlight<br>A reflection of life will keep me waiting  
>With love gone for so long<br>And this day's ending  
>Is the proof of time killing all the faith I know<br>Knowing that faith is all I hold  
><em>

Harry knew he needed to be strong, tomorrow he would have to face the entire wizarding world and tell them the story of Voldemort's demise. The reformed minestry was working hard to put their world back togther and they needed all the help they could get. He would be the face of a reformation, weather he wanted to be or not. All he really wanted was to go home, he'd had enough adventure for a lifetime. There was nothing grand or brave about his actions, they were necessary. He would have rather had to not perform them at all. Neville, who was currently lying in the bed across from him, had far surpassed Harry's own bravery. It was no mere matter to stand up to Voldemort when you were certain of death. Then were all the others who fought with so much determination; the Weasleys, all the Aurors, and even the Hogwarts students that stayed to fight. Harry was in debt to them. Unconciously, his mind flashbacked to the last moments of the battle, he was hanging on a thread. The weight of war came crashing down upon him and he was overcome by emotion.

_And I've lost who I am, (i'm waiting)  
>and I can't understand (and fading)<br>Why my heart is so broken, (and holding)  
>rejecting your love, <em>

Harry Potter drew his head from the penseive and his eyes finally saw his mission. It was never about being strong enough to defeat him, it was about staying alive so that one day, he could surrender himself to death and bring Voldemort with him. His life seemed meaningless, empty, was there ever a Harry Potter? Would anyone know of a boy who loved treacle tart and spent summers secretly doing his homework, of a boy who's joy was with his best friends? Or would they only know of some faceless stranger was a scar on his head who became the martyr for their world?

_(love) without, (onto these tears)  
>love gone wrong; lifeless words carry on (i am crying)<br>But I know, all I know's that the end's beginning (i'm dying tonight)  
><em>

But were was Dumbledore now? Couldn't Dumbledore's love save him at this moment? No, no it couldn't. Harry's mother had given her life, the strength of her love, became his magical sheild, and he had cast that off on Dumbledore's oders. But at least he would not die in vain. After he was dead, the fighting would cease and no more lives would be spent on him, no one else would die trying to protect him with no avail. The end was nearer with every passing moment.

_who I am from the start, (i'm waiting)  
>take me home to my heart (and fading)<br>Let me go and I will run, (and holding)  
>I will not be silent, (silent) <em>

Harry Potter was running, running through the halls, the ground, until he reached had the forbidden forest. He wasn't fearless, he wasn't much of anything. It was his mission to bring down Voldemort's downfall and he was determined. Nothing could stop him now.

_all this time (onto these tears)  
>spent in vain; wasted years wasted gain (i am crying)<br>All is lost, hope remains but this war's not over (i'm dying tonight)  
><em>

It occurred to him that had he known this was his destiny, this moment might not have been so difficult. Harry remembered how hard he tried to be prepared to overcome Voldemort. He had trained, furiously, in hopes. With every horcrux destroyed, his heart raced, hoping that there would be a way. But there was still hope, he wouldn't let go of that. There was Ron and Hermione, who would live after this, and Ginny. No, he dared not to think of Ginny, it hurt him too much. For her, and for all of those that died for him, he would keep fighting.

_There's a light, there's a sun (i'm waiting...)  
>taking all shattered ones<br>To the place we belong (i am waiting...)  
>and his love will conquer all<br>_

Death, it seemed was much quicker than he had anticipated. He was on station, King's Cross, and everything was lit. The light streamed through from all directions, illuminating his world.

Harry spoke to Dumbledore whose face was radiant with joy. A man of mysteries, it had always been a question; to trust him or not? Harry wished he had listened to his heart because love was the ultimate conqueror. He was alive, because Dumbledore and his belief in love had prevailed._  
><em> 

_Yesterday I died; tomorrow's bleeding  
>Fall into your sunlight<em>

Harry opened his eyes, snapping back into reality. For a minute, he saw the battlefield before the battle, in all its magnificant beauty. He saw students studying in the courtyard, quidditch players practicing in the pitch, he saw Hogwarts untouched. It would be difficult, he knew that, but he made a promise to restore this world to the same grandor as it had previously been.

Dawn had broken and with it came a new age.


End file.
